The National Democratic Congress (NDC) will never cease to amaze very critical minds in this country. The members of the party, ever since it was born, have been consistently inconsistent in everything they do.

The only thing they have done consistently and requires a deafening applause by all is their consistent failure at policy levels and mismanagement.

They are also very good at corruption in gargantuan forms. They are good at turning black emaciated goats into fat impeccable white cows. They are also very good at creating heavens for departed ones when they themselves do not know how heaven looks like.

In fact, the NDC is the only political party whose members can write a dirge for a dead man, sign for him and portray to the world that the dead man saw and predicted his own death and left that message.

Let me be very honest with you, my dear readers, until the faked write up supposedly written by the late President Mills was published, I had not set my eye on his signature. How would I when I have no judgement debt to claim from the country?

He has nothing to sign and approve for me. Indeed, even if I had one and the late President had approved payment for me, tweeeeaa, they would not have paid me.

Oh, yes, if the paying officials can ignore the late President?s orders not to pay huge sums to someone we do not owe as a nation, why can they not ignore an order that I should be paid? Me Kwesi Biney? Apeeto!

When the late President was alive, he was the best thing that ever happened to the NDC and the nation. He was asomdwoehene par excellence.

His belief in peace has no historical records neither shall it be equalled in the annals of the nation?s history.

He was a humble man as well, whose humility was exploited for the payment of none existing judgement debts. This piece is not about him so let me reserve that for the future.

However, it is important for me to let Ghanaians know that if there is any political party in this country which has exhibited peace in all its forms, that political party is the New Patriotic Party (NPP).

In the year 1992 when the NDC blatantly stole the Presidential elections, the NPP led by Nana Addo Danquah Akufo-Addo, poured out their complaints in an intellectual manner, exposing each single act of fraud and deceit perpetrated by the ruling PNDC, which had metamorphosed into the NDC, elected itself as the referee, linesmen, as they were then called and competing players in the tournament as well. That is what has become known as the Stolen Verdict.

In other countries, the opposition would have moved into the bushes and fought back to destabilize the nation.

The NPP did not do that. In the year 2008 general elections, which saw the slimmest of margin between the then ruling NPP and the opposition NDC, which has no record in the politics of Africa and the third world, the NPP, once again, gave away power to the NDC to the amazement of the world.

What peace can anybody expect from a political party like the NPP led by Nana Addo?

Yet, when Nana Addo says that if anybody attempts to use foul means, intimidations, violence and threats of violence to win power in the December 7 polls, the NPP under the courageous leadership of Nana Addo will resist it, we are branded as violent people.

Yes, I agree with the President that there will not be ?all die be die? in this country provided there is no intimidation, violence and fraud in the coming elections.

If anybody dares do that, we in the NPP will show them that we have two productive balls in between our thighs. The propagandists in the NDC should note the ?if? clause.

Today, the NDC is telling us about the ahobrasee John Dramani Mahama, the President of the Republic of Ghana.

I must say that I am writing this about the President not because I have anything against him but the stupid and insulting propaganda being unleashed unto the good people of this country by babies with sharp and iron teeth, courtesy former President Pastor Jerry John Rawlings.

One of the most difficult situations which confront us on this earth is to have humble, peaceful, and modest parents bringing forth very stubborn children, particularly when they have sharp iron teeth.

As a father, when your babies have sharp iron teeth, you may not be able to feel the harm those sharp and iron teeth can cause you. You can only identify their physical presence.

For example, if you look at the teeth of S. Akwabla Odzekuto, or Okutonoo, all of them communication people of the NDC, they may look very harmless from outside.

But the harm these sharp and iron teeth did to their mothers, hmmmmmm, there is this book I read in the Middle School which is titled ?Only Mothers Know.?

If S. Akwabla Odzekuto and Okutonoo?s mothers have not developed cancer, then God is with them. Indeed they have more access to heaven than Asomdwoehene. Whaaat, these boys? I am wondering how they insult the Founder of the NDC.

No, J.J. is a man of patience. How on earth can babies with sharp iron teeth have the courage to insult J.J? La ila ilala.

They are not the only people oooo, some idiots and failures in life like Nene Lamptey Vandapujee, Kojo Tumi Baafo and Kobina Akyeampongmaa. These thems have the courage to insult Papa Jay? Akom k3, aka ntwareho nkoaa.

Yes and these are the people Papa Jay is asking John Mahama the winner of Ghana?s most ?beautiful man? contest to either throw away with the bath water or remove them like rotten planks on a wooden bridge on many of the culverts on our rural roads or throw away with the bath water into the Odaw River, so they can munch the bacteria in the river which makes the river the most stinking river in the world.

These children of President Mahama do not respect anybody in this country.

They insult people who are more successful in their private lives than their fathers if indeed they know their fathers at all. I understand Odzekuto Akwabla?s biological father is a Kwahu who deserted him obviously because of his sharp and piercing teeth.

The man who stepped in his father?s shoes and educated him complained about Akwabla?s neglect of him and the other family members since he became a Deputy Minister in the NDC administration.

Akwabla?s piercing response was he earns only GH?2000 a month and therefore the man should not bother him. If the man had been his biological father, he certainly would not have said that to him.

In any case, there are thousands of Ghanaians who earn far less than he earns and still take care of their aged parents and their siblings.

Even in his ?poverty? Akwabla managed to organize a marriage ceremony which saw his invited guests flying to the North for the celebration.

After that, he honeymooned in the U.S.A, a country the sharp ironed ?teethed? guy takes the least opportunity to insult.

Anyway, handsome Presido, is your ?Mr. Ghana Hansomity? your biggest trump card for the coming elections?  Indeed, if you are a guy and you are handsome, whaaaat, the women will fight over you like something. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, I can now understand why people say you have so many children.

They say you have seven children indoors and another seven children outdoors. In fact, the outdoors is still counting.

The last time I came to Accra, you know I am a bush man so when I come to the city I nose around paaaaa. As I was saying, they say you have adopted a nine-month old child. Verily verily I say unto thee, unless a child is six years old you cannot adopt him/her.

A very close relation of yours said that the child was one of your away victories, and because your wife wanted to avoid any scandal, she quickly took her into your home. In fact, she did better than your predecessors? wife who will not allow any away victory cup to be placed in her hall.

JDM, as your initials state, even when you were not the President of this country, your away matches produced this much result, now that you are the President, egyaeeee, ye ewuoooo, obiara nso neba baa mu yie, na egya ahonfe esi road.

I hear that you have a catch from Takoradi, a lady you have purchased a home in the U.S. for, and she is waiting on your leisure. I will bring her name and location the next time.

At a time when this nation is groping in the dark, searching for solutions to the myriad of socio-economic challenges confronting us, the NDC can only present to us a young, handsome and affable man as President, ideas or no ideas.

Go to Nigeria, all the Presidential aspirants who contested Gen. Olusegun Obansanjo were handsome than the old General, yet he won a two-term election.

This nation wants people with ideas not those who will sexually attract young innocent ladies and exploit them because of a hopeless situation created by an incompetent regime like the NDC.

I will be back next week on our ?beautiful? President. I want to take this opportunity to inform my cherished readers that I have resumed the consumption of my mahogany bitters and between now and the election period, anybody who steps on my toe will not be spared. A SCOLARSHIP FOR THE POOR IS ONLY IN THE NORTH.

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